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How to Use Bathroom Time Efficiently

Updated on September 19, 2011

Things to do in the bathroom

People often just go to the bathroom, do their business, and come out without giving it a second thought. Let's say you spend 15 minutes a day on the toilet on average, that's 5,475 minutes a year. That's 91.25 hours, or almost 4 whole days! Can you imagine, 4 days of every year you just waste away like that. What do you have to show for it? Sure, you beat angry birds on your iPhone in that time, or read the latest issue of Archie, but did that really get you anywhere? Some people consider bathroom time to be relaxing "me" time and simply just sit on the toilet, and feel like they're doing themselves a favor by not doing anything. Taking a dump is not relaxing time. I mean sure, it relieves built up stress in your bowels, but beyond that, it's a pretty rough experience and your muscles do quite a bit of work while defecating. Relaxing is much better suited in your bathtub, on your couch, or better yet your bed. Use bathroom time for small tasks that you can get out of the way, so that you don't need to waste time doing them outside of the bathroom. Even if you're one of those people that claims to only take 5 minutes in the bathroom, you can get a lot done in those 5 minutes.

So, what tasks can you accomplish simultaneously while taking a dump? Here are some things to do on the toilet.

Make Phone Calls

If you have any phone calls at all you need to make that day, do it on the toilet! If you have to confirm plans with someone, order food, or simply just catch up with someone, this is the time to do it. When you're on the toilet, you have a time restriction to any phone call you make. After a certain point it starts to get uncomfortable and you have have to get up, thus ending the phone call. Making phone calls on the toilet will make sure you stick to the point the entire time as you don't want to stay on the toilet for hours. I always take my phone into the bathroom and play games on it, and I know other people do too, so is it really that bad to make phone calls? I started doing it a few years ago when I had to rush to the bathroom while in the waiting for my phone company. I didn't hang up so I could stay in queue, and took the phone with me to the bathroom. When I come out of the bathroom, I had effectively taken care of my business and my "business."

Check Your Messages

This could mean e-mails, Facebook notifications, phone messages, and anything of the sort. Most of these things can be accomplished on your phone, but I prefer to take my laptop into the bathroom with me. I like to read through my e-mails and take care of Facebook notifications/creeping newsfeed in the bathroom. I mean, if you were doing something important before going to the bathroom, isn't it practical to make the best of your break? That way, when you get out of the bathroom you can get straight back to work without getting distracted about checking up on things. I also sometimes check eBay when I have auctions, or other sites that I check on a regular basis. Sometimes I've been meaning to Google something (happens at least once a day) so I use the time to search whatever it is I was interested in.

Do Your Work

Whether you're in school or have a job, do some part of your work in the bathroom. Rather than treating it as a break, just take your work to the bathroom and enjoy a real break afterwards. This could mean doing whatever readings you have to do, or even typing up a report or essay of some kind. I find the best place to concentrate sometimes is in the bathroom because it's so well lit and peaceful. I started taking my textbooks into the bathroom with me and honestly for some reason anything I read while taking a crap actually because more interesting! I end up reading like 10 pages before I get up and am surprised at how fast I read it, and how much of it I took in. If I have nothing to read, I take my laptop and either watch lecture slides for online courses or do work that I may need to do. Even work that isn't school or job related you can do on the toilet; in fact, the beginning of this article was written in the bathroom.

Catch Up on TV Shows, Novels, or The News

Good old reading the morning paper is one of the most common things to do in the bathroom, I had to put that on the list. It's probably the only mainstream thing that people do on the toilet that's still kind of efficient. Reading the paper helps you catch up with news and gives you something to do in the bathroom, but I find reading the news on a laptop works a lot better. It's easier to browse for stories that interest you, and much easier to hold than spreading out the entire newspaper. I was never comfortable with holding a newspaper wide open with both hands and reading it; besides it made me feel like a grandpa. Reading a novel is definitely better than reading comics or something, I always read a few pages of my novel every time I'm reading one with me to the bathroom, and I can finish it in about a month's time depending on the length. Novels are actually educational as they help keep your reading skills in line, and you can even read the books that you've been meaning to read but never got around to. If you know you're going to be in there for quite a while, watch an episode of a TV show in the bathroom. Most TV episodes are around 20 minutes, some even 40 minutes. If you're really crunched for time but really want to catch the latest episode of something, just watch it in the bathroom. You'd be wasting that time doing something else anyways.

Eat

Okay I know that's really gross and definitely not on my list of things to do on the toilet. I myself, cannot even chew gum while I'm taking a crap. The smell and the whole atmosphere is disgusting and really kills my appetite. However, if you have the power to do it, then by all means go for it. I don't know how pressed for time someone would have to be to take this route, but really sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures! If eating in the bathroom means you can get an extra 15 minutes of sleep later, then go for it. If not a meal, you can even eat a snack or something in the bathroom. You have to wash your hands at the end of it either way, so might as well.

Think or Plan

Use bathroom time as time to plan something out. Plan out what you need to do for the rest of your day, or the next day, or the weekend. Plan what you're going to eat, when you're going to go grocery shopping, when you're going to finish an assignment. Take your planner with you and make all the adjustments you think you need to make. If nothing organizational, think about work related things. Think about what you're going to write as a thesis for your latest article, or how you're going to kill off a character in that new novel you've been writing, or how you're going to break up with your girlfriend. Planning things ahead of time obviously saves you a lot of frustrating decision making on the spot. When you're on the toilet, you can think with a clear mind and think about whatever it is you need to think about calmly.

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